Bush has decided the voters deserve answers about his "lost years"
(1968-74). To that end, campaign HQ is publishing, in a serialized
format, a supplement to W's autobiography.
were somewhere in New Haven around the edge of campus when
the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like
"I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe we should head back to the
dorms." Then suddenly, a Volkswagen van, painted rainbow
colors, howled by us with beautiful hippy chicks hanging out the
windows yelling, "Viva la Revolution!" It was the spring
of 1968, we had just finished Yale, and I turned to my buddy and
said, "Somehow this doesn't seem like the time to join the
secret ruling-class conspiracy."
grinned, seeming to understand. "George," he said, "drugs
are cheap...sex is free...this is the beginning of a whole new era
in human civilization. The next ten years are going to be one amazing
party...don't miss this!"
wanted me to come on some road trip with him to LA or Vegas or something.
I told him I was down with the party of the century, but that I
needed to be properly situated first. "My trust fund is different
from yours...mine has certain strings attached."
he asked incredulously, as though I was talking nuclear physics
or something. And by this time he was looking a bit lightheaded
man, my Dad's running for Senate right now, and my grandfather was
a famous senator, and his father was a powerful admiral, and it
goes on like that all the way back to the pilgrims, you know? All
eyes are on us, and now there's a war on.... Aw, just forget
it, it's a ruling class thing--you wouldn't understand," I
said, giving up.
yes, the WAR!" he said, as if I was talking about
a long-forgotten missed appointment, "But what's that
got to do with us?"
on, "My Dad's running for office...so if I sit the thing out
people will cry foul. The bottom line is, if I don't compromise
on this, I'll be cut off."
what the hell are you going to do? You're not going anywhere
near that meat grinder are you?...ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR
MIND?" He started jumping around getting very excited.
The uppers were definitely getting the upper hand. I considered
breaking out the reds to balance things out a bit, but then I just
tried reasoning with him.
man, listen: I'm going to fly jets in Texas."
He was intrigued enough by that to stand still and listen for a
going to fly jets man!...freaking SUPERSONIC jets!...in
shit! That's beautiful...did you say jets? Are you
really talking about jets, though?" He was so
moved by what I was saying that he was grabbing me by the neck and
shaking me as he asked for confirmation that what he heard was not
a drug-induced hallucination.
I only have to show up on weekends...It'll keep Dad off my back
while I spend the rest of the time partying and chasing women, and
best of all I get to fly jets!"
shit! Authenticity AND time to party! That's quite a setup Mr. Bush!
Jets! That's pretty damn amazing. I gotta admire you for that. Wow,
I wonder what a mescaline rush is like when your breaking the sound
soon see, my friend! We'll soon see!"
in tomorrow when W gets his graduation check for $17,000,
a car--and some other supplies--and goes on a mission to sign up
for the Guard.
email suggestions--or full episodes--to firstname.lastname@example.org.
If I use your episode, you get a by-line. If I get a bunch, I'll start
posting good ones on a separate page. It would be fun to have a few
different plot lines unfolding at the same time.