this from guest editors dangfunny.com:
'VACATIONGATE' SCANDAL ROCKS ADMINISTRATION
--President was to play sick to avoid going back to work
--Some staff members covered up
--Cheney: 'Heads will Roll!'
--Congress Examining!

CRAWFORD, Tex. (August 31) - In a far-reaching scandal that could have huge implications, President Bush has been caught in a scandal, known to reporters covering the President as 'VacationGate,' a conspiracy to get the President an extension of his month-long vacation.

According to sources close to the White House, President Bush planned to call in sick on Sept 3rd, the day he is supposed to return to the White House from his ranch in Crawford, Texas, when he would not really be sick.

An elaborate trick was planned, including a voicemail to be left in Dick Cheney's mail box, in which the President was to speak in a gravel voice, inserting many false coughs in an effort to fool the Vice President into thinking he was really sick. The President would then spend an extra hour in bed, then get a check from the White House physician, then he would slip out and go horseback riding.

Sources say the President was seeking to squeeze out at least two to three days of golf, fishing and horsehoes from this scheme.

Presidential Adviser Karen Hughes was apparently a partner on the scheme; along with the White House physician that travels with the President. The duo were unable to persuade spokesperson Ari Fleischer to join the conspiracy. Sources say Fleischer, known as the 'boy scout' of the administration, went and told Cheney immediately. Hughes, speaking on background, referred to Fleischer as a 'tattle' and a 'brat.'

A furious Vice President Cheney ordered a complete investigation, sources say he is sure 'some heads will roll.' Cheney said that he would not accept any sick days after September 2nd. "And if anyone leaves a message that they are sick on my voice mail, instead of calling me directly -- they are fired. Period!!"

Senator Joe Biden (D-DE) confirmed that there would probably be hearings in the Senate, that would not only look into the Vacation gate scandal but also would investigate the 'abnormal number of personal days and two-hour lunches' that this President has taken.

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